|
(NOTE: Pictures posted on the regular version of the list are deleted
from the digest and are archived separately. Viewing them requires a password
available exclusively to list members.) Member Profiles posted to the list are also moved into a separate viewing area, but do not require a password. Please click here to browse through them.
silverfoxesclub-digest
In this issue:
Subject: Fw: Silverfox watching fuck movie on TV
Ben, I might add, this very good friend of mine was 81 when this photo was
taken!!! Not bad eh? I think he is wonderful!
Cheers,
Subject: Fw: Silverfox watching fuck movie on TV
HA! I didn't know you were on this list, Peter!
Jolly good to have you here! Now we have our
New Zealand correspondent again. I shall never
forget on my long defunct Boxer's Foxes list
that item about the dykes in Auckland
horse-whipping an effigy of the homophobic mayor
through the streets in the Gay Pride Parade. I
still laugh about it! Yes, the gent in the photo is
gorgeous at 81 or any age. Is that your guy?????
Ben
Subject: Christian Coalition or Christian collusion?
Ben Boxer repeats (endlessly): Notice
to all churches - Stay Out of Politics
and Let Mankind Progress Instead of
Regress!
Headline:
Text:
A construction worker on the 5th
floor of a building needs a handsaw.
He sees another worker on the
ground floor and yells down to him,
but he can't hear him.
So the worker on the 5th floor tries
sign language. He points to his eye
meaning "I", points to his knee
meaning "need," then moves his hand
back and forth in a hand-saw motion.
The man on the ground floor nods his
head, pulls down his pants, whips out
his chop and starts masturbating.
The worker on 5th floor gets so
pissed off he runs down to the ground
floor and says: "What the fuck is your
problem!!! I said I needed a hand
saw!"
The other guy says: "I knew that! I
was just trying to tell you -- I'm
coming!"
Ben Boxer comments: The author of
the item below turns a neat phrase
several times in it. My favorite is
"constructive silence in the presence
of diversity."
Headline:
A grown son reflects on the difficulty
of getting his conservative father to
understand how his vote for president
is also a referendum on his son.s life
By John Caldwell
Text:
I was 18 years old, and I vowed never
again to talk politics with my father.
Too many heated conversations had
highlighted our mutual contempt for
each other.s politics, my father
wielding his like a scepter.
As the closeted gay son of a hippie
mother, I brought special fervor to the
rebellion phase of the father-son
relationship. My father is a
conservative Republican who knows
nothing of constructive silence in the
presence of diversity. And our caustic
discourses on political matters caused
a pain that wrenched in my chest for
years.
This gap in our relationship was
normal for my father, whose parents
would take off for Europe and leave a
note on the front door, letting him
know that the maid would be there to
cook his meals for the next two
weeks. His father, my grandfather,
was a man who would scream .I
won.t take that for one iota. at my
grandmother.s occasional lapses into
independence. He gave my father the
tools he needed to form a narrow view
of how politics, and the world, should
work.
My mother unintentionally shielded
me from that by divorcing my father
when I was 7 years old and
transporting me to a world of incense
and Eastern philosophy. Ideas about
universal balance combined with an
awareness of my homosexuality
helped me to form a political posture
that was radically different from that
of my father who later praised Dan
Quayle.s performance in the 1988
vice presidential debates.
At a recent family reunion in Lake
Tahoe, Calif., that I attended with
Todd, my partner of three years, I
discovered that nothing has changed.
My father and stepmother could not
bear the overwhelming pressure of
withholding their views on the current
presidential election. Although the
rest of us, fairly liberal and content
voting family members, managed
silence, my parents jumped in at every
inappropriate opportunity to open
their mouths.
I started an hourly regimen of
antacids as a familiar knot
reappeared in my stomach. Their little
groans and judgmental sighs at the
mere mention of Al Gore on the
evening news echoed like gunshots in
my head, while their constant verbal
praise for .Dubya. made me want to
scream, .Stop it!.
But I was, as I had long ago vowed to
remain, silent. I told Todd that any
attempt to communicate my position
on the election would be a hopeless
waste of energy. The idea that we
make political choices because of who
we are would be lost on my father. His
only reason for voting Republican is
to have .less government.. Beyond
that there is absolutely no
consideration of others. It is a
righteousness that tramples over
everything in its path, including his
children.
When I was 18 he did not know I am
gay. But now Todd and I are a part of
his life. And when he vocalized his
views in our presence, I felt that old
pain in my chest extending to envelop
Todd.
Several weeks after returning home
from the Lake Tahoe experience,
Todd and I hosted his parents for a
long weekend, and I overheard a
cordial conversation between him and
his father.
.I.m not sure whom I.m going to vote
for in this election,. his father said
over morning coffee, politely sharing
his pluses and minuses for the two
leading candidates while I
eavesdropped from the kitchen.
.There are things I like about both..
I was flabbergasted. This behavior so
drastically contrasted with my
father.s staunch, unwavering, and
ignorant views that to draw a
comparison would be laughable. It
was all I could do to keep from
throwing my arms around him and
saying, .I love you, Dad!.
But Todd.s father is a retired
Southern Baptist minister, and calling
him Dad would destroy the
improbable father.son-in-law
relationship we have meticulously
constructed over a long and strenuous
period of learning to understand.
Todd.s father had climbed the
equivalent of Mt. Everest to get to
that dining room table that day. In the
beginning he sought counseling from
an .ex-gay. ministry and provided
Todd with some .reparative therapy.
books as well as his belief in the
frighteningly dogmatic ideologies
therein. The reverend (and his wife)
did not even want to know my name,
and he showed no signs of acceptance
for our relationship or our
community.
But the value he places on his
relationship with his son helped him
through that. Conversations are still
limited to topics other than sexuality,
but talks about politics and social
conditions are wide open between
them, as is a kind of love that
transcends the reverend.s strict
disapproval of homosexuality.
My father, on the other hand, has
nothing that transcends his
disapproval of my political positions.
Periodically, he will forward to me an
E-mail of a political joke with a
Republican slant. Every time this
happens I shake my head and wonder
if this is his version of reparative
therapy.trying to convert me from
my political condition.
My father remains my nemesis when
it comes to social or political views.
After that family reunion, it occurred
to me that for the rest of his life my
vote might serve onlyas a symbolic
cancellation to his. And though he
accepts my homosexuality, I may
never be able to share with him how
my politics are a significant part of my
being gay.
But Todd.s family has brought hope
to my situation. His father.s ability to
come to our house and impartially
discuss the pros and cons of the
presidential candidates with him
speaks volumes about the growth that
is possible between a father and his
son.however his father may finally
vote on November 7.
Subject: Unusual response
I received the following 'unusual' response to an Ad of mine on the Internet
(not Silverfoxes Clubhouse).
First it shocked and disturbed me, but in a way I don't care what others
think of my sexual preferences.
Regards from Holland,
Oscar
You are a real and I mean real F**KEN JERK if you think that old old old men
can perform in bed or any where else. If you weren't so screwed up
emotionally and every other way I would and do feel sorry for you. You are
a
pathetic excuse for a human being. As an outsider what do you think of the
human race? If you are attracted to men who are old enough to be your FATHER
or GRANDFATHER then it is you and not I who needs professional help. And I
will say it again and again and again that you are looking for a FATHER
FIGURE or definitely a SUGAR DADDY? I hope you rot in HELL with your SUGAR
DADDY or FATHER FIGURE. There I've said it again. How do you like that you
miserable SON OF A B**CH? You are a lowlife of the highest order and if I
never hear from you again it will be too soon. Good riddance to bad rubbish.
Subject: Fw: Unusual response
Thanks for sharing that freaky response to your
ad. I am glad it wasn't the one in the Silverfoxes
Clubhouse, but we get nuts in there, too.
Such a letter as that guy sent you is another form of computer virus. We
should always be ready to deal with the strange cyberspatial unknown.
Awake
That's my "Triple A" (AAA), and I don't mean the American Automobile
Association!.
We must be awake to everything that comes our way on the Internet, alert to
the possibility that it may have been sent to harm, and aware of the need to
reject it immediately and not let it disturb our peace of mind.
If it's on or through the Internet, its reality is an illusion. It can't
really touch us or hurt us or make us unhappy unless we give it a foothold
in our door.
Shut it out. Don't take it in. It will vanish into the empty cyberspace from
which it came. It is simply nothing.
I have had to learn that lesson after much experience
on the Web in my public position. My best friend is
the Delete Key. Out! Gone! Bye-bye! Back to your
native nothingness 'cause I won't let you fuck with me!
Like so many things in life, it's a state of mind that
has to be cultivated and nourished in our heads and
dispatched when needed to calm our emotions and
fears.
End of silverfoxesclub-digest V1 #18
|