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silverfoxesclub-digest
Monday, November 27 2000
Volume 01 : Number 058

In this issue:

-humor for some
-Dr. Laura got it right! (+ responses)

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Date: Sun, 26 Nov 2000 21:55:27 -0500
From: "luvhog"

Subject: humor for some

A man goes to the doctor after feeling ill. The doctor says, "You know, you should have come to see me sooner. Unfortunately you have waited too long and you are going to die this evening."

The man is distraught and wonders how he is going to tell his boyfriend. Well, he tells him and he takes it pretty well. "Honey, this is going to be a night that you will always remember," he says. "I am going to treat you like a king." He prepares a scrumptious gourmet dinner with wine, candles, the works.

After dinner he slips away and returns in the most incredible posing strap the man has ever seen. He leads him into their bedroom. They make the most passionate love they have ever made. The man is beside himself. Once done, the boyfriend rolls over to go to sleep knowing he kept her promise.

Well, the man is wide-awake watching the clock. He knows that he is doomed. He taps his boyfriend..."Honey?" he whispers. He rolls over and again proceeds to make love. Again when they were done he rolls over and he taps him. He is getting cranky, but under the circumstances he grants his dying wishes. Finally the boyfriend rolls over and begins to snore.

Well, the man decides to tap him again. "Honey?" he whispers. He rolls over and yells, "Oh sure! You don't have to get up in the morning!!!"
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Date: Mon, 27 Nov 2000 00:12:23 -0800
From: "Ben Boxer"

Subject: Dr. Laura got it right!

I ran across the most famous, albeit infamous, quotation from Dr. Laura while on the Internet this past weekend. It struck me in a way it had not before. I have not heard the latest scuttlebutt on what is happening to her TV show. Stories vary from canceled to reassigned.

I don't much care. I suppose she is still doing well on radio and making millions on the divisive mutual hatred and distrust which have been animating opposing partisans during the election crisis.

However, my perception of her statement, "If you're gay or a lesbian, it's a biological error," has taken a turn for the better. By her use of the word "biological," the foolish woman has given the lie to arguments from her side that we are not a naturally occurring phenomenon.

What is biology, and, by extension, all things biological?

1.The science of life and of living organisms, including their structure, function, growth, origin, evolution, and distribution. It includes botany and zoology and all their subdivisions.

2.The life processes or characteristic phenomena of a group or category of living organisms.

3.The plant and animal life of a specific area or region.

Thus has Dr. Laura stated a truth about us. We are a biological occurrence, a life process as opposed to merely a lifestyle.

As for her use of "error," the word is equated in my thesaurus with "misconception," and that, indeed, is what we are.

We are the naturally occurring (biological) misconception (error) of humanity seen as entirely heterosexual at all times in every given situation. We are natural birth control. We are the natural link between the male and female sexes. We people the gray area of the orientation spectrum between sexual black and white.

Now that I have settled the question of Dr. Laura in my own mind and have found her estimation of us to be stunningly correct, I find myself turning in thought to our place in the Christian creation myth which speaks first of man, Adam, and later adds woman, Eve, in the Garden of Eden.

Where were WE? I rack my brain. I fret. I strain.

AH! Eureka! "I've found it!"

We were the forbidden fruit!
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Date: Mon, 27 Nov 2000 06:44:38 -0500
From: "Digital Artistry"

Subject: Re: Dr. Laura got it right!

Har har har!

Actually, if I may, can I use your letter to counter a few nasty posts on a certain bulletin board where there are some heterosexists arguing that homosexuality is learned? I'm sure they'd get a real kick out of it.

As for the christian creation myth... Actually, I believe we weren't even in the garden of eden. Adam and Eve weren't the only "people" on the planet at the time, they were simply the first two and the ones in the garden. See, god realized that he'd made a big mistake with those two. So he made them stay in that little garden while he perfected the art of creating the rest of us. When they finally got smart enough to realize that they were supposed to make the breeding stock for the rest of the world, he "banished" them from the garden and they were fruitful and multiplied. But lets face it, we were the ones god got right, those two were just an experiment gone wrong.

Toodles,
Me

P.S. Ben, why do your posts always come across in what looks like 40 columns? (old 8-bit days). Also, did you swallow a Flash editor? Your web pages have been getting over-animated, some of us poor slobs are still chuging along on dialups and find all that nifty-spiffy animation rather slow. Remember, less is more. :) (SHADDAP! We've all seen ya nekkid)
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Date: Mon, 27 Nov 2000 08:54:19 -0800 From: "Ben Boxer"

Subject: Re: Dr. Laura got it right!

- ----- Original Message -----
From: "Digital Artistry"
To: "Ben Boxer"

...Actually, if I may, can I use your letter to counter a few nasty posts on a certain bulletin board where there are some heterosexists arguing that homosexuality is learned? I'm sure they'd get a real kick out of it.....
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Ben replies:

Sure, go ahead and use it. It's a better argument than hypothesizing that Eve was transgendered and taught Adam the joys of oral sex by sucking on the forbidden fruit, which was his banana.
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P.S. Ben, why do your posts always come across in what looks like 40 columns? (old 8-bit days).
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Ben replies:

Because I condense them that way as a means of preventing line ends from breaking and spreading sentences and paragraphs all over the page. That drives me nuts.
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Also, (Ben), did you swallow a Flash editor? Your web pages have been getting over-animated, some of us poor slobs are still chugging along on dialups and find all that nifty-spiffy animation rather slow. Remember, less is more. :) (SHADDAP! We've all seen ya nekkid)
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Ben replies, smirking:

You made a reference above to "old 8-bit days"? Ha! Look who's talking! The name of the game in personal computers is UPDATING so as not to be left behind. I have done that relentlessly since 1978, not only with hardware and software, but also with methods of access since I got on the Internet in the mid-90s of the 20th century. It is now the 21st century. I endured regular dialups until finally faster service became available in my area. I went for it.

My sites serve people in all situations. I do what I can, but I can't serve them all, nor do I believe that because they are behind for whatever reason, I have to stay there with them.

You can bypass the Flash at the Clubhouse entry by going directly to the second page (index2.html).

If you were using your noodle, you would have thought of that and bookmarked the page for direct access. The Locker Room called "Pilot Daddy" also has a second page you can use for the same purpose. The newest one, "Let's Get It On," does not have a bypass because it follows a different format, but all you have to do is write to me and I will make it possible for you to see its contents one way or another. Don't expect me to revert to your "old 8-bit days." Stay abreast.

As for swallowing the Flash editor, yes, I do. He's my partner, disease-free.

P.S. Give me a list of the over-animated pages and I will consider adjustments where possible.

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End of silverfoxesclub-digest V1 #58
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