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silverfoxesclub-digest
Sunday, November 19 2000
Volume 01 : Number 050

In this issue:

-Plague of purple kisses
-Deep Thoughts
-"Telos" for gay lovers
-Surprise!

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Date: Sat, 18 Nov 2000 13:09:09 -0800
From: "Ben Boxer"

Subject: Plague of purple kisses

Plague of Purple Kisses

It may seem strange to some, but one of my regular stops for the past 50 years whenever I have visited or lived in Paris has been a renowned cemetery where the remains of many famous people are interred. I used to love strolling there, sometimes taking a book with me to read while sitting on or near the tomb of its author. That's where I read Oscar Wilde's "The Ballad of Reading Gaol" for the first time, and two books by Colette, one of which inspired the musical play "Gigi."

It is famous not only for the dead, but also for its cats. They are everywhere, fat and happy, well-fed on the mice and rats that in turn dine, shall be say, six feet under. I have always been a cat lover, and once when I lived in Paris, I stupidly took my two dachshunds with me to the cemetery. That was a short visit! Although they had a cat of their own at home, the army of felines at Pere Lachaise was more than they could handle. They literally dragged me out of the place, terrified of the butch pussies that snarled at them from behind tombstones.

Irreverent cuss that I am, my very favorite spot in the cemetery, on which I wasted endless film taking pix over the years, was the tomb of the Fuk family, their name emblazoned across it in big, gold letters. I sent the pix to friends worldwide, my favorite being one I had a friend take of me and my lover at the time, simulating a bend-over butt-fuck squarely in front of the tomb. Ah, youth!

Headline:
Fans mar Oscar Wilde's grave

Elegant tomb suffers rash of mauve kisses

(Agence France Press, 11/18/00)

Text:
The thousands of Oscar Wilde fans expected to pay tribute at his grave on the centenary of his death this month are in for a major disappointment: the tomb has been defaced by scores of pale mauve kisses.

Some kisses are hand-painted and some have been lip-applied, and together with a scrawl of multilingual graffiti they form a hideous rash over the face of an otherwise elegant tomb.

Wilde's grave has long been a place of pilgrimage. He died a pauper's death in a seedy hotel in the Latin Quarter of Paris on Nov. 30, 1900, and was buried in the Pere Lachaise cemetery in the working-class eastern half of the city in a tomb paid for by an anonymous ``lady.''

Since then, the grave has attracted a steady stream of admirers who regard Wilde not just as a celebrated playwright, poet and wit but as an early gay martyr. He fled to Paris in disgrace after serving a two-year prison sentence imposed for a homosexual love affair.

The sphinxlike angel that guards the tomb, sculpted by Sir Jacob Epstein, was originally a well-endowed male, but his male parts have been removed, not once but twice -- first by an outraged cemetery-keeper who, legend has it, used them as a paperweight, and later by a souvenir hunter.

The plague of purple kisses threatens to be equally damaging. Containing animal fats, the lipstick sinks into the stone and the stone-masons responsible for the upkeep of the cemetery monuments are unsure if the marks can be removed.

The tomb was last restored in 1992 and a plaque was added at the base reading, in English and French: ``Respect the memory of Oscar Wilde and do not deface this tomb.''

The kisses reportedly began a few years ago when a visitor thought it would be a good idea to place a mark of affection on the tomb, and then people started joining in. The latest curse is graffiti.

``Ti Amo!'' exclaims one. ``El mejor,'' comments a Spanish-speaker. ``Oscar forever and more smack,'' claims another.

Several visitors, including Kevin, Marc, Regine and Antonella, have inscribed their names, often thoughtfully indicating the date of their efforts. ``Romeo Deutschland'' is registered twice. Aidan of Dublin has misquoted Wilde's famous line about lying in the gutter but staring at the stars.

Most of the markings appear to have been added in the past two months. Cemetery officials say periodic attempts are made to clean graffiti off tombs.

The former inmate of Reading Gaol is not the only distinguished foreign guest of the Pere Lachaise cemetery to attract visitors from around the world.

The tomb of Jim Morrison, lead singer of the Doors rock group who died of a heart attack while passing through Paris in 1971, has suffered similar indignities to that of Wilde, although it was recently cleaned up and is now spotless. The present difference is perhaps due to the fact that Morrison's grave has a full-time guard. Wilde, ever the outcast, has no such protection.
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Date: Sun, 19 Nov 2000 00:19:06 -0800
From: "Ben Boxer"

Subject: Deep Thoughts

Deep Thoughts:

Never raise your hands to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected.

I'm not into working out. My philosophy: No pain, no pain.

I am in shape. Round's a shape...

I'm desperately trying to figure out why kamikaze pilots wore helmets.

Ever wonder if illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?

I always wanted to be somebody, but I should have been more specific.

Did you ever notice when you blow in a dog's face he gets mad at you? But when you take him in a car he sticks his head out the window.

Have you ever noticed? Anybody going slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac.

You have to stay in shape. My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She's 97 today and we don't know where she is.

The reason most people play golf is to wear clothes they would not be caught dead in otherwise.

Anytime four New Yorkers get into a cab together without arguing a bank robbery has just taken place.

I have six locks on my door all in a row. When I go out, I lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three.

The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they are okay, then it's you.

Now they show you how detergents take out bloodstains, a pretty violent image there. I think if you've got a T-shirt with a bloodstain all over it, maybe laundry isn't your biggest problem. Maybe you should get rid of the body before you do the wash.

I ask people why they have deer heads on their walls. They always say because it's such a beautiful animal. There you go. I think my mother is attractive, but I only have photographs of her.

A lady came up to me on the street and pointed at my suede jacket.'You know a cow was murdered for that jacket'? She sneered. I replied in a psychotic tone, 'I didn't know there were any witnesses. Now I'll have to kill you, too.'

Future historians will be able to study at the Gerald Ford Library; the James Carter Library; the Ronald Reagan Library and the Bill Clinton Adult Bookstore.

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Date: Sun, 19 Nov 2000 00:18:41 -0800
From: "Ben Boxer"

Subject: "Telos" for gay lovers

Ben Boxer comments: I spent some of my youth in Argentina. Being gay was dangerous, but that only gave it an extra edge. I had many sexual adventures with Argentine men, who liked it more than they admitted because they always came back for more.

I have recorded one story about those days in Boxer's Booths at the Snooker Club, www.boxersfoxes.com, called "The Tiger's Tail," a sex scene from which is included in a CD I am recording right now for people to buy in time for Christmas. I will be offering 74 minutes of dramatic readings of hot action on the CD, excerpted from several of my stories. It can be played on CD players in the car or anywhere, or in a computer, if preferred.

Headline:
Argentina's discreet way with sex: Telos provide privacy for Argentine lovers

(For BBC News by Daniel Schweimler in Buenos Aires, 11/17/00)

Text:
Everything about the telo is discreet. I did not even know they existed until someone pointed them out to me... then I saw them on many street corners and dark side streets.

They do not advertise themselves. Their windows, if they have windows, are dark and their front doors always closed tight. Those that have car parks have them hidden round the back or underground.

Telos are often identified by the words "albergue transitorio" or "transit hostel", displayed discreetly by the door, and perhaps a dim red light.

They are not hotels, neither are they brothels. Some are cheap and somewhat seedy. Others are used by film stars and politicians and boast every luxury imaginable.

But telos have only one purpose...to provide a safe, comfortable place in which to have sex.

Argentinians in general have a complicated attitude to sex.

There are few places where men strive to be more macho. Machismo is idolised in the culture of the virile gaucho or cowboy riding the pampas on his horse, or the well-dressed city slickers who are the subject of so many sad tango songs. That machismo is often measured by the number of sexual conquests a man can notch up...

Yet Argentine women are supposed to be as virtuous as their mothers, to emulate the Virgin Mary.

The great Argentine heroine, Eva Peron, is dubbed Santa Evita, or Saint Evita, by her supporters. But she is said by her enemies to have been a woman of loose morals who slept her way to the top.

That other great Argentine hero, the footballer Diego Maradona, has been heard, as he leaves restaurants in the early hours, extolling the virtues of his wife and children - while a prostitute hangs on each arm.

There are therefore many affairs....and where better to conduct them than in a telo. But people cheating on their spouses are not the only ones to frequent telos.

Most young Argentines have their first, nervous sexual experiences there - usually some distance from their houses so the neighbours do not spot them entering or leaving. Most people do not leave home until they marry so the telo again provides a more private refuge than the local parks. These tend anyway to be littered with kissing couples at any time of the day or night.

They provide a secluded hideaway for gay lovers in a still homophobic society.

And telos are ideal for married couples who crave a little intimacy, away from boisterous children and perhaps a prying mother-in-law.

No-one ever admits to using telos...so I shall have to relate the experiences of a friend of mine.

He was visiting Buenos Aires with his Argentine wife and two small children. They squeezed into her parents' already overcrowded apartment but desperately needed some privacy to celebrate their wedding anniversary. With the grandparents willing to babysit, they said they would go out for a meal.

Conveniently a telo was situated on their way to the restaurant and with a quick glance over their shoulders to check no-one they knew was passing by, they darted through the front door. The receptionist was barely visible behind a smoky pane of glass.

"Would you like the twenty-five, the thirty or the forty dollar room?" he asked.

I, I mean my friend, was too embarrassed to ask what customers got for the extra money and went for the thirty dollar option. Cash only... no potentially incriminating credit cards.

The room was clean and plush, the en suite shower had a window that looked out into the bedroom. The bed was large and the seats soft and furry.

Drinks could be ordered by telephone and arrived in a two-door hole in the wall so that room service never see the guests and the guests never see room service.

A packet of condoms, bearing the telo's logo and extolling the virtues of safe sex, lie by the bed. There are mirrors everywhere and a television with an endless number of channels - many of them pornographic.

And, surprisingly, English football is showing - Leicester City versus Liverpool - a potentially dangerous option, guaranteed to dampen the ardour of even the most passionate relationship.

Special deals are offered for off-peak visits and, like any good hotel, guests are invited to fill in a customer survey form, suggesting any way to improve the service.

On the way out, a chance encounter with another departing couple. Sheepish grins but no eye contact.

Many telos try to portray themselves as respectable. But by their very nature they will always carry with them an air of seediness and perhaps even danger. Or maybe that's just because I have an uptight, British attitude towards these kind of things.

Okay, I'll come clean, although you've probably already guessed by now, it was my wife and I who went to the telo, not our friends.

But when, in a moment of candour, we told the family where we'd been they merely shrugged and said: "Yes, we knew."

A shame, since the surreptitious sneaking about and the nervous planning were all part of the fun.
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Date: Sun, 19 Nov 2000 05:20:30 -0800
From: "Ben Boxer"

Subject: Surprise!

If some of you who have placed profiles as list members wake up this morning or any morning this week and discover that e-mail from this list in your In-Box, SURPRISE! Hee hee!

I have discovered that several of you sent in profiles, some with pix, without being members of this group.

I am a trusting soul, and when I first announced the new profile system, I trustingly expected everyone to be straight up and honest about their membership. I did not check the list membership records, primarily because I was swamped with profiles and had no time for administrative details.

What I have done now when I find profiles of people who are not list members is to register them as a subscriber to the digest so that they will not be swamped with e-mail they didn't expect.

I can't help but giggle at people who try to pull a fast one and get caught with their pants down. I know some of you will write me nasty letters and bitch about this terrible thing I have done, but frankly, my dears, I don't give a damn. I will happily remove you from the list if this makes you unhappy, but your profile will go, too, PLUS your personal ad and your listing in the general Clubhouse Member Profiles not associated with the list.

I would be happier if you stayed on, however, and behaved like gents. That is entirely up to you.

As for the vast majority of members who play a straight game, I want you know how much I appreciate you. Many of you have written kind and supportive letters during the Natividad virus crisis -- which is over now, thanks to one of our subscribers in France who found a cure for it and also to QueerNet, our list server, who trapped the little fucker and beat the shit out of it.

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End of silverfoxesclub-digest V1 #50
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