| NOTE: Pictures posted on the regular version of the list are deleted
from the digest and are archived separately. Viewing them requires a password
available exclusively to list members. Member Profiles posted to the list are also moved into a separate viewing area, but do not require a password. Please click here to browse through them.
silverfoxesclub-digest In this issue:
-Just a little fun - I hope!!!! (+ responses)
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Subject: Just a little fun - I hope!!!!
NOTICE OF REVOCATION OF INDEPENDENCE
To the citizens of the United States of America,
In the light of your failure to elect a President of the USA and thus to
govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your
independence, effective today.
Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchical duties
over all states, commonwealths and other territories. Except Utah, which
she does not fancy. Your new prime minister (The rt. hon. Tony Blair, MP
for the 97.85% of you who have until now been unaware that there is a world
outside your borders) will appoint a minister for America without the need
for further elections. Congress and the Senate will be disbanded. A
questionnaire will be circulated next
year to determine whether any of you noticed.
To aid in the transition to a British Crown Dependency, the following rules
are introduced with immediate effect:
1. You should look up "revocation" in the Oxford English Dictionary. Then
look up "aluminium". Check the pronunciation guide. You will be amazed at
just how wrongly you have been pronouncing it. Generally, you should raise
your vocabulary to acceptable levels. Look up "vocabulary". Using the same
twenty seven words interspersed with filler noises such as "like" and "you
know" is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication. Look up
"interspersed".
2. There is no such thing as "US English". We will let Microsoft know on
your behalf.
3. You should learn to distinguish the English and Australian accents.
It really isn't that hard.
4. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as the
good guys.
5. You should relearn your original national anthem, "God Save The Queen",
but only after fully carrying out task 1. We would not want you to get
confused and give up half way through.
6. You should stop playing American "football". There is only one kind of
football. What you refer to as American "football" is not a very good
game.
The 2.15% of you who are aware that there is a world outside your borders
may have noticed that no one else plays "American" football.
You will no longer be allowed to play it, and should instead play proper
football.
Initially, it would be best if you played with the girls. It is a
difficult game. Those of you brave enough will, in time, be allowed
to play rugby (which is similar to American "football", but does not
involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full kevlar
body armour like nancies). We are hoping to get together at least a US
rugby sevens side by 2005.
7. You should declare war on Quebec and France, using nuclear weapons if
they give you any merde. The 98.85% of you who were not aware that there
is a world outside your borders should count yourselves lucky. The
Russians have never been the bad guys. "Merde" is French for "sh*t".
8. July 4th is no longer a public holiday. November 8th will be a new
national holiday, but only in England. It will be called "Indecisive Day".
9. All American cars are hereby banned. They are crap and it is for your
own good. When we show you German cars, you will understand what we mean.
10. Please tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving us crazy.
Thank you for your cooperation.
Subject: fwd:- just a little fun
HA HA HA
brilliant peter...........i did have a good laugh at that.
keep the funny's coming.
I'm gonna out that up on my website :o)
all the best
Subject: Oh Dear Me
I don't think i can take much more of this....................hehehe
You guys are killing me here :o)
Love
Subject: Re: Just a little fun - I hope!!!!
Then who is going to rule over us in Utah?? :)
Subject: QueerNet's Navidad Virus Solution
QueerNet.Org has advised me that
they have trapped the Navidad.exe
virus attachments now, so no more
of them should be coming to the
list. We owe a debt of gratitude to
Roger Klorese, our man at QueerNet.
Thank you, Roger!
Ben Boxer
From: "Ben Boxer"
Ben Boxer applauds: I used to know
(biblically) an Australian sailor from
Hobart (Tasmania) with a
presumably male Taz (Tasmanian
devil) tattooed on his beer belly. It
was wearing a tutu (ballet skirt) and
used to dance when he let loose his
usual hearty laughs. I guess he can
go home, now.
Headline:
(The Advocate, 11/15/00)
Text:
Subject: Inside Queer as Folk
Ben Boxer comments: I know a lot of
you are waiting to see "Queer As
Folk," a North American version of
the gay TV series of the same name as
the hugely successful one originally
produced in Britain. It is being filmed
by Showtime in Canada (shades of
"The Kids in the Hall"!). Here is a
current report on the production:
Headline:
By Dennis Hensley
Text:
Im putting a little rouge on my penis
to make it look longer, quips Sparks,
the shows unofficial morale-booster,
just before the cameras roll. A nice
horizontal stripe.
Action is called; theres a knock at
the door. Michaels over-the-top
roommate, Emmett (Peter Paige),
skitters off to answer it, and in struts
the wrong guyBrian, Michaels best
friend and the shows resident
shit-stirrer (played by sexy newcomer
Gale Harold). Instantly the tension
rises. Michael has long carried a
torch for Brian, and Brian uses that to
keep Michael where he wants him:
beholden yet unfulfilled. Brians no
sooner plopped himself down on the
sofa and doffed his designer
sunglasses than he starts making
trouble by helping himself to the
chocolate iclairs that Michael bought
especially for his outing with Dr.
Dave.
Insert it into your mouth in a phallic
way, Gale, coaches the episodes
director, Canadian film vet David
Wellington, between takes. Make it
a performance. Harold takes the
note gamely and in subsequent takes
looks longingly at the iclairs before
swallowing them whole. Linda
Lovelace would be proud.
This is such a blast, Harold
chuckles after the scene is wrapped.
I get to be the ultimate antihero
every day. Like in the scene today, I
was only there to cause problems.
Like Stuart from the original U.K.
Queer as Folk, on which the
Showtime project is based, Brian is an
Olympic-level bed hopper and
completely unapologetic about it.
Asked how many different sex-scene
partners hes had so far, Harold
laughs and says, Thats a hard
question. He counts on his fingers for
at least a half a minute, then gives up.
Somewhere over 10.
Thats Brian, the bad boy who never
grows up, laughs Dan Lipman, one
of the shows executive producers, a
bit later in the shows production
office. (The set is now off-limits while
Sparks and Potter shoot a love scene
between Michael and Dr. Dave in
Michaels childhood bedroom.) We
all have friends that were not too
wild about, but why do we like them?
Well, because we understand. Still,
Lipman is quick to point out that
Queer as Folk has more to offer than
men behaving badly. We have a
whole tapestry of different kinds of
gay characters, boasts the producer,
who along with his work and life
partner, Ron Cowen, created the
series Sisters and the AIDS-themed
TV movie An Early Frost, both of
which won Emmys. Theres a
domesticated lesbian couple with a
child; Brian and Michael, who are
about to turn 30, which is a certain
kind of death in this world. Theres
Ted, who is 33 and running after
young guys who are inappropriate for
him; Dr. Dave, who is in his late 30s
and very relationship-oriented.
Theres Michaels mother, Debbie,
played by Sharon Gless, who is so
overly supportive you want to strangle
her. Theres also Michaels uncle,
whos in his late 40s and has AIDS
and [has been revitalized] because of
the cocktails and has to deal with his
life; and, of course, Justin, a
17-year-old gay young man who is not
in conflict about his sexuality. This is
not an after-school special where hes
walking on the beach in scenes of
emotional conflict
Adds Cowen, This is probably the
first time in history that gay people
will actually get a chance to see their
lives portrayed truthfully on television
with no restrictions and no
censorship, unless Showtime kowtows
to the MPAA ratings board. But it
was certainly written and filmed with
the intention of showing all aspects of
gay life honestly. Yes, that includes
foam parties, nipple piercings,
recreational drug use, and scads of
same-sex lovemaking scenes,
including repeated couplings between
our 29-year-old Jeep-driving,
loft-living lothario, Brian, and our
baby-faced but hungry for experience
high schooler, Justin. Some gay
people will be upset that straight
people are seeing things that they
would wish they would not see,
asserts Cowen. But I think politically
correct behavior is a form of
internalized homophobia, that you are
basically afraid to show straight
people what your life is really like,
and so you put forth a PC image out
of fear.
For Thea Gill and Michelle Clunie,
the actresses who play the lesbian
couple, dramatizing the frustrations,
expected and unexpected, that come
with starting a family made for a
refreshing challenge. It seems like
any time I see lesbians portrayed in
film, they have to be carrying guns
and doing something dangerous,
says Clunie, who plays no-nonsense
attorney Melanie. Were just two
women trying to cope with life. But
that doesnt mean they dont get
frisky. They are in sexual
situations, vows Cowen. They make
love; we see that.
Thats good news to Gill, who plays
Melanies lover, Lindsay, a college art
teacher who was artificially
inseminated with her friend Brians
sperm. Its been pretty subtle for us
so far, so Michelle and I are like,
OK, were ready for our big sex
scene now!
------------------------------
|