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Silverfoxesclub-digest
Tuesday, May 15 2001
Volume 01 : Number 239

In this issue:

-Joke: All day sucker
-Things not to say to a man's penis, my 2 cents
-Quiz
-Fwd: 51 days

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From: santa224 santa224@email.com
Subject: Joke: All-day sucker

George and friends, if you can bear an ancient teen-age joke, among the first raunchy jokes I heard (and thus you know it was a _long_ time ago--shortly after teen-age raunchy jokes were invented) was along these lines:

The traveling salesman stopped at the farmhouse (and I'm condensing here) and the only place for him to sleep was in the bed of the farmer's young daughter. When he undressed and climbed in, she said "What are those?"--"Well," he said, "these are my gumdrops and this is my lollipop." Then off tp sleep he went, only to awaken with a wonderful sense of "bodily joy"--and he saw that he had cum--"What happened?" he asked the farmer's daughter, and she said, "Well, I was playing with your gumdrops and licking your lollipop, and first it turned into an all-day sucker--and then into an ice cream cone!--I hope that was okay . . . ?"

Santa224
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From: "James Leahy" burghnative@hotmail.com
Subject: Things not to say to a man's penis, my 2 cents

You sure your not a girl?
You must be a grower not a shower.
Geez! you couldn't even use that as bait.
You must be "Needle Dick the Bug Fucker".
What do I think of what?
and last but not least, All kidding aside, show me the real one.

Jim Leahy
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From: "Michael W" michaeljohn@webtv.net
Subject: Quiz

This isn't like other quizzes....don't bother getting a pen and paper...just read.

1. Name the five wealthiest people in the world.
2. Name the last five Heisman trophy winners.
3. Name the last five winners of the Miss America contest.
4. Name ten people who have won the Nobel or Pulitzer prize.
5. Name the last half dozen Academy Award winners for Best Actor and Actress.
6. Name the last decade's worth of World Series Winners.

How did you do? The point is, none of us remembers the headliners of yesterday. These are no second-rate achievers. They're the best in their fields. But the applause dies. Awards tarnish. Achievements are forgotten. Accolades and certificates are buried with their owners.

Now here's another quiz. See how you do on this one:

1. List a few teachers who aided your journey through school.
2. Name three friends who have helped you through a difficult time.
3. Name five people who have taught you something worthwhile.
4. Think of a few people who have made you feel appreciated and special.
5. Think of five people you enjoy spending time with.
6. Name a half dozen heroes whose stories have inspired you.

Easier? The lesson? The people who make a difference in your life aren't the ones with the most credentials, the most money, or the most awards. They're the ones who care.
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From: bishinik@uswest.net
Subject: 51 days

A bartender is sitting behind the bar on a typical day when the door bursts open and in come four exuberant blondes. They come up to the bar, order five bottles of champagne and ten glasses, take their order over and sit down at a large table.

The corks are popped, the glasses are filled and they begin toasting and chanting, "51 days, 51 days, 51 days!"

Soon, three more blondes arrive, take up their drinks and the chanting grows, "51 days, 51 days, 51 days!" Two more blondes show up and soon their voices are joined in raising the roof. "51 days, 51 days, 51 days!"

Finally, the tenth blonde comes in with a picture under her arm. She walks over to the table, sets the picture in the middle and the table erupts. Up jumps the others, they begin dancing around the table, exchanging high-fives, all the while chanting, "51 days, 51 days, 51 days!"

The bartender can't contain his curiosity any longer, so he walks over to the table. There in the center is a beautifully framed child's puzzles of the Cookie Monster. When the frenzy dies down a little bit, the bartender asks one of the blondes, "What's all the chanting and celebration about?"

The blonde who brought in the picture pipes up, "Everyone thinks that blondes are dumb and they make fun of us, so we decided to set the record straight. Well, ten of us got together, bought that puzzle and put it together. The side of the box said 2-4 years, but we put it together in 51 days!"
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End of silverfoxesclub-digest V1 #239
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