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Silverfoxesclub-digest In this issue:
-Quote of the Day (2)
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For those of us that are under the age of 40--which 4 of Elizabeth Taylor's
Ex-hubbies are gay? Please tell me Rod Steiger is one of them...
David
#1 Nicky Hilton, spoiled playboy son of Conrad Hilton and an heir to the Hilton Hotel fortune, married her when they were not much more than kids and took her to Europe and was drunk the whole time they were married, which wasn't long. He was a gambler and a boozer, and they say most alcoholic men are repressed homosexuals.
#2 Michael Wilding was an English actor (Taylor was born in England of American parents which made her a British subject and qualified her for the "Dame" title she carries today, but she came to the States at age 9.) who had a couple of kids with her, but they were divorced after a Hollywood gossip columnist informed Taylor and English actress Jean Simmons that their respective husbands had been gay lovers for years. Simmons was married to English heartthrob Stewart Granger.
#3 Mike Todd was prolly straight. I lived in Manhattan when they got engaged and he had a big reputation around town as a wheeler-dealer ladies' man. I was in Cartier Jewelers the day after he bought Liz the famous "skating rink" diamond engagement ring there. My Cartier salesman told me Todd had picked it out and whipped out $75,000 cash for it on the spot. He also told me that Todd went into Cartier's and bought "little baubles" like $500 cigarette lighters for many women. She really loved him and I think she was a trophy for him. He was killed in a small-plane crash.
#4 Eddie Fisher (father of Carrie Fisher in "Star Wars") was a famous crooner. I had his job in the Army after he got out. In our unit, he was remembered for his short arms and long dick. A buddy of mine got his cast-off shirts because he had the same funny little arms. I heard that Fisher was a great "swordsman" as we used to call a straight cocksman, and his sexual feats were legendary. She broke up his marriage to Debbie Reynolds (Carrie's mom) when he over-consoled Liz after the death of Mike Todd.
#5 and #6 She married Richard Burton twice. They had a stormy relationship, but were treated like a king and queen. I was living in Rome when they made "Cleopatra" and saw them several times. He was super sexy. I have heard pros and cons about his sexuality, He was essentially a stage actor, which makes him suspect, as the roster of stage actors involved in gay episodes is a mile long.
#7 John Warner was a stuffy senator who prolly never had sex with anybody, but who knows! The senate pages in those days were like a harem for those guys. I went to school in Washington and knew several pages. Hee hee.
#8 Larry Fortensky spent time in jail as I recall and was a construction worker, two venues famous for gay and bi.
The guys on the bottom row were her buddies, not her husbands. She has always been a classic Queen Bee, Fag Hag, whatever.
Malcolm Forbes was a multi-millionaire motorcycle queen whom all the male bike dykes and leather types in New York called their own. His son, Steve, is famous for two things: running for prexy of the USA (and losing in the primaries) and for denying that his father was gay, the evidence notwithstanding.
Montgomery Clift was the prettiest thing on the New York stage as a teenager and became a big movie star. He and Taylor, who started out with a crush on him, became like brother and sister. He was gay as a kite and an alcoholic. He was drinking too much at one of her parties and had a car accident on the way home which messed up his beautiful face. In his last film, "The Misfits," with Clark Gable and Marilyn Monroe (last completed film for all three of them, I think), he camped it up on the set so much as a queen that they had to tone him down because he pissed off the cowboys (it was a sort of western).
Roddy McDowell was a lifelong friend. They made movies together as kids. He was also very gay.
Rod Steiger was married to English actress Claire Bloom for years. Some say it ended so he could pursue a penchant for men. Might be true, given his intimate friendship with Liz. It has been said that her best relationships are with gay men because they don't treat her like a goddess the way straight men do and yet they adore her and understand friendship with women, which straights certainly do not.
The Madam opened the brothel door to see a frail,
elderly gentleman..
"Can I help you?" the madam asked.
"I want Natalie," the old man replied.
"Sir, Natalie is one of our most expensive ladies, perhaps someone else..."
"No, I must see Natalie."
Just then Natalie appeared and announced to the old man that
she charges $1,000 per visit.
Without blinking, the man reached into his
pocket and handed her ten $100 bills. The two went up to
a room for an hour,whereupon the man calmly left.
The next night he appeared again demanding to see Natalie.
Natalie explained that no one had ever come back two nights
in a row and that there were no discounts...
it was still $1,000 a visit.
Again the old man took out the money, the two went up to the
room and an hour later, he left.
When he showed up the third consecutive night, no one
could believe it.
Again he handed Natalie the money and up to the room they went.
At the end of the hour Natalie questioned the old man: "No one
has ever used my services three nights in a row. Where are
you from?"
The old man replied, "I'm from Philadelphia."
"Really?" replied Natalie. "I have family who lives there."
"Yes, I know," said the old man. "Your father died,
and I'm your sister's attorney. She asked me to give
this $3,000 to you."
(Some things in life are certain:
taxes, death and being screwed by an attorney.)
(Smile)...NO COME ON,, NO Lawyers should have been offended by
that joke.
A man woke up to find a gorilla in his backyard tree.
He phoned the nearest S.P.C.A. The service man arrived with a stick, a
Chihuahua, a pair of handcuffs and a shotgun.
"Now listen carefully," he told the homeowner.
"I'm going to climb the tree and poke the gorilla
with this stick until he falls to the ground. The Chihuahua
has been trained to go straight for his balls, and not let go.
When the gorilla crosses his hands to protect
himself, you slap the handcuffs on him." "Got it!
But what's the shotgun for? "asked the homeowner.
"If I slip and fall out of the tree before the gorilla",
the service man said, "Shoot the Chihuahua!!!!!!!!"
Actual Answering Machine Messages Recorded and Verified
By The World Famous International Institute of Answering Machine Messages:
10. My wife and I can't come to the phone right now, but if you'll leave
your name and number, we'll get back to you as soon as we're finished.
9. Hello, you are talking to a machine. I am capable of receiving messages.
My owners do not need siding, windows or a hot tub, and their carpets are
clean. They give to charity at the office and
don't need their picture taken. If you're still with me, leave your name and
home phone number and they will get back to you.
8. This is not an answering machine - this is a telepathic thought-recording
device. After the tone, think about your name,
your number, and your reason for calling.... and I'll think about returning
your call.
7. Hi! John's answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator. Please
speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself with one of these
magnets.
6. Hi. This is John: If you are the phone company, I already sent
the money. If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my bank, you
didn't lend me enough money. If you are my friends, you
owe me money. If you are a male, don't worry, I have LOTS of money.
5. A is for academics, B is for beer. One of those reasons is why we're not
here. So, leave a message.
4. Hello! If you leave a message, I'll call you soon. If you leave a "sexy"
message, I'll call sooner.
3. Hi. Now YOU say something.
2. Hi. I'm probably home, I'm just avoiding someone I don't like. Leave me a
message, and if I don't call back, it's you.
And the Number 1 Actual Answering Machine Message Recorded and Verified by
The World Famous International Institute of Answering
Machine Messages:
1. Hello, you've reached Jim and Sonya. We can't pick up the phone right
now, because we're doing something we really enjoy. Sonya likes
doing it up and down, and I like doing it left to right... real slowly. So
leave a message, and when we're done brushing our teeth, we'll call you
back.
"The prince has to choose a suitable wife
and not simply one that will make him happy
does not have the most suitable name. This
one does not belong to an ideal family, has
not received the correct education to be a
princess, has to share a flat to make ends
meet and work to pay for her upkeep and
studies."
All agree, however, that Eva Sannum has at
least one major asset that qualifies her as a
"suitable" escort for the prince on the social
scene; she is six feet tall. The handsome
prince, 33, is six inches taller, and, one
would hope after taking a gander at his
beautiful face, is hung accordingly.
Looking at him, one enjoys remembering
that although Prince Felipe's dad is Spanish,
his mother is Greek. There may be hope
yet.
Is the prince's father Don Juan de Bourbon, or is that his grandfather?
Hal
Grandpa was Don Juan End of silverfoxesclub-digest V1 #228
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