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Monday, April 09 2001
Volume 01 : Number 202

In this issue:

-$10 Million from Versace Auction
-Humor: Two Stories
-California equals Greed?
-Assorted Humor
-Best wishes for Passover (2)
-The Company
-Humor: And The South shall Rise Again
-Regrets (5)

From: "Ben Boxer"
Subject: $10 Million from Versace Auction

The contents of Casa Casuarina, Gianni Versace’s Mediterranean-style Miami estate, were auctioned off for three days ending Saturday, April 7, by Sotheby’s in New York. The eclectic contents included theatrical costumes, ready-to-wear designs, evening gowns, and costume sketches along with furniture and artworks.

Mitchell Owens, interior design director at Elle Decor, told the Los Angeles Times, “It’s all gilt and pectoral muscles. It’s very hypermasculine and homoerotic. It was all about being loud and flashy and nouveau riche and having a damned good time doing it.”

Elaine Whitmore of Sotheby’s, on the other hand, stated, “He was a genius, not only because of his bold combination of colors and texture in combination with antiques and art, but he also had great taste.... It was not garish at all.”

The 600-lot auction was expected to fetch up to $7 million, but surpassed $10 million. Proceeds from the auction will go to PAX, a New York charity promoting gun safety, and to the National Center for Victims of Crime in Virginia.

On the steps of his mansion in the trendy South Beach neighborhood of Miami, the gay Italian designer was gunned down in July 1997 by gay serial killer and ex-model Andrew Cunanan. The murderer later took his own life, capping a cross-country murder spree which included his ex-lover and a wealthy silverfox who may have tricked with the killer. The house has already been sold for $19 million.

The name Gianni Versace (pronounced "Johnny VerSAHchay") was synonymous with a line of nouveau clothing he created that bespoke glamour and brilliance in low-cuts and leathers with overtones of S&M, for men and women.

Born into poverty in Calabria, Italy, Versace projected a new concept of fashion so utterly sensual and wickedly suggestive that it captured the attention of couturiers worldwide. Because his styles tempted the erotic, he had his detractors among feminists and Christians, but he also drew hordes of disciples. The controversy served him well, increasing awareness of his designs and the desirability and prestige of owning his work.

Before his death, auctions of his fashions earned millions for AIDS relief in Africa. His glamorous sister, Donatella, continues the family business.

"Versace thumbed his nose at those who said his fashion was the height of bad taste -- as many did when he showed his sadomasochistic collection at one big fashion show," Wensley Clarkson attested. "His linebacker-shouldered, studded leathers and floral prints enthralled as many as it appalled. By the mid-1990s, the Versace label was dominating the world of fashion design. By 1995, Versace had profits of $900 million a year."

Movie stars, royalty and rock icons wore his one-of-a-kinds at the largest galas. Many of them, such as Princess Diana, were his dearest friends.

Versace had just completed a highly publicized and successful tour in Europe when he and his entourage of promoters and bodyguards arrived in Miami Beach on July 12. Worn down from a hectic schedule, Versace planned to "quiet down my life and enjoy more my privacy," as he told a business partner. He was 50 years old and desired downtime to enjoy the world.

Andrew Cunanan went looking for him in the upper-priced gay bars that Versace was known to frequent when wanting to relax. His favorite spots were The Twist, the KGB Club or Liquid. Every morning, it is believed, Andrew walked the pavements between Versace’s iron gate on 11th Street to Ocean Drive, where, at the News Cafe, the celebrity often partook of his favorite gourmet coffee. On these trips, Versace was usually alone.

On the morning of July15, 1997, Andrew caught up with Versace and followed him home from the News Cafe. What exactly he had against the celebrity is still anyone’s guess -- one theory in FBI files claims Versace had once turned Andrew down for a modeling job -- but as the luminary slid his key into the scrolled gate outside his mansion, Andrew stepped up behind him and pumped two .40 caliber bullets into his head.
Subject: Humor: Two Stories

A couple of drinking buddies who are airplane mechanics are in a hangar at JFK New York. It's fogged in and they have nothing to do. One of them says to the other, "Man, have you got anything to drink?" The other one says, "Nah, but I hear you can drink jet fuel, and it will kinda give you a buzz."

So they do drink it, get smashed and have a great time, like only drinking buddies can.

The following morning, one of the men wakes up and he just knows his head will explode if he gets up, but it doesn't. He gets up and feels good. In fact, he feels great! No hangover! The phone rings. It's his buddy. The buddy says, "Hey, how do you feel?" "Great", he said! "Just great"!

The buddy says, "Yeah, I feel great too, and no hangover. That jet fuel stuff is great. We should do this more often!

"Yeah, we could, but there's just one thing . . . "

"What's that?"

"Did you fart yet?"

"No . . . "

"Well, DON'T, 'cause I'm in Phoenix."
Where is God?

A couple had two little boys ages 8 and 10, who were excessively mischievous.

They were always getting into trouble and their parents knew that if any mischief occurred in their town, their sons were probably involved.

The boys' mother heard that a clergyman in town had been successful in disciplining children, so she asked if he would speak with her boys. The clergyman agreed but asked to see them individually. So the mother sent her 8-year-old first, in the morning, with the older boy to see the clergyman in the afternoon.

The clergyman, a huge man with a booming voice, sat the younger boy down and asked him sternly, "Where is God?"

The boy's mouth dropped open, but he made no response, sitting there with his mouth hanging open, wide-eyed.

So the clergyman repeated the question in an even sterner tone, "Where is God!" Again the boy made no attempt to answer.

So the clergyman raised his voice even more and shook his finger in the boy's face and bellowed, "WHERE IS GOD!"

The boy screamed and bolted from the room, ran directly home and dove into his closet, slamming the door behind him.

When his older brother found him in the closet, he asked, "What happened?" The younger brother, gasping for breath, replied, "We are in BIG trouble this time, dude. God is missing -- and they think WE did it!"
From: "David Cantu"
Subject: California equals Greed?

I can't help but find this article (from intriguing-especially after all of the trouble this company is having....

SAN FRANCISCO, California (AP) -- The parent company of a California utility awarded bonuses to thousands of mid-level managers and other employees hours before it filed for bankruptcy, a newspaper has reported.

PG&E Corp. Chairman Robert Glynn issued an internal memo late Thursday announcing the bonuses and raises for about 6,000 eligible employees of Pacific Gas and Electric Co., the San Francisco Chronicle reported Saturday.

The payments were made in time for many of the bonuses to be deposited into workers' bank accounts before the utility filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy Friday morning, according to the Chronicle, which obtained a copy of the memo.

California Gov. Gray Davis issued a brief statement Saturday in response to the report, saying, "PG&E's management is suffering from two afflictions: denial and greed."

The bonuses and raises were earned as part of the company's incentive program. PG&E spokesman Ron Low said Saturday that the money for the payments came from a combination of a $1.1 billion tax return, paying power generators only what the company receives in rates, and cost-saving measures such as halting the installation of underground transmission lines.

The raises and bonuses were given to midlevel managers, secretarial staff and other support staff. No money was distributed to rank-and-file union members who already received a wage increase earlier this year as part of their contract, Low said.

Los Angeles lawyer David Huard of Manatt, Phelps & Phillips said the practice of compensating employees before filing Chapter 11 is not uncommon. In addition, the U.S. bankruptcy court in San Francisco granted approval for PG&E to make outstanding compensation payments to employees and to maintain related bank accounts.

But state Assembly Republican Leader Dave Cox said it's disgraceful to the state's ratepayers. "Declaring bankruptcy and at the same time providing increases and bonuses for employees would just be in your face to the consumers of the state of California," he said.

California utilities, including PG&E, are struggling with massive debts related to the state's power crisis. Utilities have been crippled by skyrocketing wholesale energy prices, which they haven't been able to pass along to consumers under the rules of a recent deregulation of the state's power market.

P.S. from Ben Boxer: Ha! Think "Erin Brockovich"! That is the Julia Roberts movie, of course, telling the tale of the above company's gross and irresponsible misconduct which led to pollution and death for many of the public in an area of Southern California and of the company's arrogance from beginning to end.
Subject: Joke

It's the spring of 1957 and Bobby goes to pick up his date, Peggy Sue. Bobby's a pretty hip guy with his own car and a ducktail hairdo.

When he goes to the front door, Peggy Sue's father answers and invites him in."Peggy Sue's not ready yet, so why don't you have a seat?" he says."That's cool," says Bobby.

Peggy Sue's father asks Bobby what they are planning to do. Bobby replies politely that they will probably just go to the malt shop and a drive-in movie. Peggy Sue's father responds, "Why don't you kids go out and screw? I hear all of the kids are doing it."

Naturally this comes as quite a surprise to Bobby and he says Whaaaat?" "Yeah," says Peggy Sue's father, "Peggy Sue really likes to screw. She'll screw all night if we let her." Bobby's eyes light up and he smiles from ear to ear. Immediately, he has revised the plans for the evening."

A few minutes later, Peggy Sue comes downstairs in her little poodle skirt with her saddle shoes and announces that she's ready to go. Almost breathless with anticipation, Bobby escorts his date out the front door while dad is saying "Have a good evening kids," with a wink.

About 20 minutes later, a thoroughly disheveled Peggy Sue rushes back into the house, slams the door behind her and screams at her father: "DAMMIT DADDY! THE TWIST!!!!! IT'S CALLED THE TWIST!!!!!"

Joe aka AtomicPunk.
Subject: Assorted Humor

An old soldier was celebrating 82 years on this earth. He spoke to his toes.

"Hello toes!" he said, "how are you, toes? You know, you are 82 today. Oh, the times we`ve had! Remember when we walked in the park in summer every Sunday afternoon? The times we waltzed on the dance floor? Happy birthday, toes!" "Hello knees", he continued. "How are you, knees? You know you`re 82 today. Oh, the times we`ve had! Remember when we marched in the parade? Oh, the hurdles we`ve jumped together. Happy birthday, knees!"

Then, he looked down at his crotch. "Hello Willy! If you were alive today, you'd be 82 years old!"
BENTONVILLE, ARK (AP) - Some Wal-Mart customers soon will be able to sample a new discount item:


The world's largest retail chain is teaming up with E&J Gallo Winery of Modesto, Calif., to produce the spirits at an affordable price; in the $6-8 range.

"While wine connoisseurs may not be inclined to throw a bottle of Wal-Mart brand wine into their shopping carts, there is a market for cheap wine," said Kathy Micken, professor of marketing at Roger Williams University in Bristol, R.I.

"There is wine in a box that people are willing to buy," she said. "The right name is important."

The top 15 suggested names for Wal-Mart Wine:

15. Box O' Grapes
14. Chateau Traileur Doublewide
13. White Trashfindel
12. Big Red Gulp
11. Grape Expectations
10. Domaine Wal-Mart: "Merde du Pays"
9. NASCAbernet
8. Chef Boyardeaux
7. Peanut Noir
6. Blue Light Special Nun
5. Chateau des Moines
4. Martha Stewart's Sour Grapes
3. I Can't Believe It's Not Vinegar!
2. World Championship Wriesling
and the number 1 name for Wal-Mart Wine...
1. Nasti Spumante
An old guy approches the window at a movie theater with a chicken on his shoulder, and asks for 2 tickets. The girl at the counter wants to know who is going in with him.

He replies, 'Well, my pet chicken, of course!'

'I'm sorry,' The girl tells him. 'We can't allow animals in the theater.'

The guy goes around the corner and stuffs the chicken into his pants. He returns to the window, buys his ticket and goes in. Inside the theater, the chicken starts to get hot and begins to squirm, so the man unzips his pants so the chicken can stick it's head out and watch the movie.

Seated next to him is a woman. She looks over at his lap and is horrified. She elbows her friend Myrtle and whispers, 'Myrtle, this man over here has just unzipped his pants!'

Myrtle whispers back, 'Oh, don't worry about've seen one, you've seen them all.'

Agnes says, 'I KNOW...but this one's eating my POPCORN!!'
From: "Ben Boxer"
Subject: Best wishes for Passover

I have not sent a Passover card this year but I extend wishes for a peaceful holiday to all those of the Hebrew faith and in particular to the Israelis and the Palestinians who are trying so hard to find a way together in the Holy Land of Christians, Moslems and Jews. It is a time of family gatherings and lavish meals called Seders. May the feasting include all and exclude no one from the banquet table which all must share in the Middle East.

Today is also Palm Sunday and next Sunday is Easter for the Christians. Good Friday comes in between. May the stone of hatred and mutual mistrust be rolled away as it was from the tomb and may Love come forth to inspire the faithful of all religions who will converge upon Jerusalem during this season.

Peace, shalom, salaam!
Subject: Re: Best wishes for Passover

Well said, Ben. I join with you in expressing the same sentiments. You said it so much better than I ever could.

Ethan in LA
From: EArmstrong@AOL.COM
Subject: The Company

Can you imagine working for a company that has a little more than 500 employees and has the following statistics:

*29 have been accused of spousal abuse
*7 have been arrested for fraud
*19 have been accused of writing bad checks
*117 have directly or indirectly bankrupted at least two businesses
*3 have done time for assault
*71 cannot get a credit card due to bad credit
*14 have been arrested on drug-related charges
*8 have been arrested for shoplifting
*21 are currently defendants in lawsuits
*84 have been arrested for drunk driving in the last year

Can you guess which organization this is? Give up??

Click for answer

Ethan in LA
From: "Frank Moretti"
Subject: Humor: And The South shall Rise Again
A Southerner is having his breakfast (coffee, grits, biscuits, and jam) when a Northerner chewing obnoxiously on gum sits down next to him.

The Southerner ignores the Northerner who,nevertheless, starts a conversation.

Northerner: "When you Southern people eat bread, do you eat the whole slice?"

Southerner : "Yep."

Northerner: (after blowing a huge bubble) "We don't. Up North, we only eat what's inside. The crusts we collect in a container, recycle it, then transform them into biscuits and send them to the South."

The Northerner has a smirk on his face. The Southerner listens in silence.

The Northerner persists: "Do you eat jam with biscuits?"

Southerner: "Yep."

Northerner: (cracking and smacking his gum between his teeth and chuckling). "We don't. Up North after we eat fruit for breakfast, we put all the peels, seeds, and leftovers in containers, recycle them, transform them into jam, and then send it down South"

Then the Southerner asks: "Y'all have sex up North?"

Northerner: "Why of course we do", the Northerner says, as he pops another big bubble.

Southerner: "And what do y'all do with the condoms once ya use 'em?"

Northerner: "We throw them away, of course.

Southerner: We don't. Down South we put 'em in a jar, recycle 'em, melt 'em into chewing gum and sell 'em to you Yankees."
Subject: Regrets

I was sitting in a restaurant the other day when this beautiful older man came in and sat down.Being only about 10 feet away i could see he wasn't wearing a wedding ring.We made eye contact several times but I was too scared to do anything about it.I'm sure we will never run into one another again and now I have this overwhelming sense of regret,especially because it was fear that kept me from doing anything.As I quickly discovered if you snooze you lose.
From: "Pewit"
Subject: Re: Regrets

1. Try going back to the restaurant at the same day/time.
2. Try asking the staff if they know him saying you think he might be a movie star or distant relative.
3. Next time you see him, ask him if he is a movie star by way of an introduction and go from there....

Editor of the Gray Gay Guide
The online guide to places for mature men and admirers worldwide
From: "David Cantu" Subject: Re: Regrets

My dear child....never, ever, ever pass up a chance to strike up a conversation with an older guy!

One reason I am real popular among the older crowd is because I am so open with them about my feelings-I am not "out" per se, but, everytime I see an older guy (with or without a wedding ring on) I always have to strike up a conversation with him. You just 'never know'. Besides, the married ones play around just as much as the single ones..maybe even more since they already know what they're missing.

About a week ago, I went over to a function that was being given at one of the local churches when I noticed this very beautiful older guy (69 years old). I just had to go strike up a conversation with him and he wound up being a Priest (!). All I can say after that is that I've been 'blessed' a couple of times and am expecting to get 'blessed' again tomorrow evening.

Like they say, "You just never know!"

From: "Larry W"
Subject: Re: Regrets

How I agree! Never pass up the opportunity. However, I certainly understand one's hesitancy.

Last year a dear friend died. Unable to attend the memorial service I went to a reception in his memory at his home. I entered the foyer and then entered the dining room. A very handsome 40 y/o (I'm 61) was standing there speaking with a priest friend. The young man without hesitation reached out to me and touched my tummy and chest and said, "I like you!" I was flabbergasted, but very pleased and complimented. Well, we chatted briefly, and managed to leave at the same time. Once outside he stopped and tenderly kissed me. Since then we've been together several times, and I have had the most enjoyable, satisfying, and erotic sex with him. I look forward to each of our times together. He keeps asking, "Why are all the guys I like either married (as I am) or so far away?" I'm so glad he had the courage to make a move.

Hugs -
Larry (in San Diego)
From: "Pewit"
Subject: Re: Regrets

I am sure you could help some of the more inexperienced by giving some tips and tricks :-)

In a gay location it's different, but if you are approaching strangers in a "straight" environment (e.g. a store/restaurant/straight bar etc) I think it's always useful to try to get eye-contact first and then have an opening remark which is complimentary, and non-threatening, but gives the opportunity for the "target" to know he is being admired, for instance:

1. "Excuse me, I couldn't help staring but I could I have seen you in a movie or on TV?"
2. "Excuse me, I couldn't help staring because you look just like my favourite uncle/cousin/lifetime friend, what's your surname?"
3. "Excuse me, can you tell me where you got that watch/shirt/tie/jacket? a friend lost a favourite just like it - and he's always wanted a replacement" (Subtle gay relationship reference which the initiated should pick up on)

Always ask an open question that requires them to respond and have a backup question in waiting - for example, for the questions above:

1. "I can't think of the Actors' name but he's a good looking guy with - insert target attributes most admired here - do you get asked for your autograph often?"
2. "Well I am sure you're as much fun as my uncle/cousin/friend even if you're not him, what do you do for entertainment around here?"
3. "Well it's not quite the same, but it looked good on him and it looks good on you too, do other people comment about it? "

The direct approach (e.g. "I love your clothes - they'd look great on my bedroom floor") can also work but you do risk rejection.

Editor of the Gray Gay Guide
The online guide to places for mature men and admirers worldwide

End of silverfoxesclub-digest V1 #202












Answer: It's the 535 members of the United States Congress. The same group of jerks that crank out hundreds of new laws each year designed to keep the rest of us in line.

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